If only they knw the truth

hiaz...felt rather "huh?" lately. how shld i go about...hmm...

to make it simple,a summary! ;)

ok, b4 my army days, i used to have a associate(NOT GANGSTERS LA!!). 1 gin gang of us, especially me, always hang out, drink...machiam, leading ah beng life style. indeed, there is some politics inside....but i gotta admit, it was a NON-VALUED added phase of my life. seriously, my mum always said, "those days, i wonder y u listen to pple, and hate ur mum..." during my army days...i reflect...yap...i was wrong. tat's y, i love my army life(to a certain degree!).

3 yrs had pass, i never mix with them liao. hiaz...pple who dunno, all assume tat the "universal truth fellow" and me turn off over a toilet paper! hahaha...if only they ever knw the truth! well, i dun bother to explain to them anyway.

however, i gotta admit...am a person who seek value-added friends! and if i felt u are value-adding me, or added, this friendship will be a lasting one! haiz...y bother to mix wif pple tat de-value u? i spent chunk of my pre army days being de-value...like? hmm...hurting my ego like, "u think u very handsome?", "r u the type to study Uni meh?dun waste time!" and washing my brain like," ur mum is a control freak!", "all gals are bitches!"...etc...now maybe some of u will be surprise..tat i WAS a low self esteem freak!wohahaha..and now...the EGOISTICAL BASTARD HAS LANDED!!woahahah

so gotta thanks my old unit, i learn bout self confident! i learn tat i can do wat i nv dare...yap...of course now u tell me to sit roller coaster...no way! but hey, if i need to sit, i will...lol... afterall, from a non swimmer, to swimming in the sea, to now can at least free style(but turtle spd)!

i remb since young, when mum cried over family matters, i always told her, "is ok to fall, and we CAN get up. but we must get up in STYLE!" today? hahah...my mum doing better than those jerks who look down on her in the past! and yes, i was down during "tat" period, always boast and really drank 15 bottles of beer per nite...crazy rite?i call it stupid! thanks buddha, lol...i found a new path! and cut off from tat route!

indeed, tat associate of mine, he fell,maybe worst than me. but the problem wif him? he got up, but nv fully. and no style at all. with tat, he poision all those around him to be at his level! i'm not being bitter. i'm being observent! really...

cloud left, she's an aduitor now
pete left, he's a IT spec now
i left, 1)i nv knw i can study better than b4
2)i surprise myself w the no of girls i have after cutin the route!
ps: this is not boasting,juz a statistic
3)i love my life and my surrounding,and yes...i dun blame anyone!

i do not wanna go those tat still wif him, coz afterall, they were my friends..but yap...i believe life will be better if they nv mix so much wif him...

but this particular one...i like to share,coz afterall, he's the one who make me wanna blog today. tat associate of mine, cook up a story tat i, while being in CDO, hate Guards! i gotta confess, no such rubbish! so this "One" got piss off...so somehow, i also nv like him as a person, and he almost "outdo" me in Honour and Glory...only to injure and downgrade. seriously..i have a foul mouth, but when i knw bout his mishap, i juz felt sorry for him, becoz after all the training, downgraded...i can understand the "fall". there is no happiness in me. i really dun remember! seriously, i wont be tat happy if justino die, but i'll be happy if he kenna bully by ppe everyday! i'm mean...not evil~ lol...

and when ty went to tat gathering last wk, tat "ONE" said tat if i ever return, he'll kill me.... wow...he really hate me more than i dislike him for something i nv ever done. i guess, afterall, this is the final victory...someone hate me for i-dunno-why-reason. tat mean somewhere along this path, i done something victorous...

now, i'm still not yet recover from my fall. coz i'm jobless,not earning...but i knw, i worth this wait. coz i'm schooling!;) and yes, i will stand up in style! ;)